HyOnYourScript.com

Last updated July 2008

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There are no guarantees in life, and especially in the world of movies. But you can definitely improve your odds of turning your dreams into dollars by making sure your screenplay is as strong as possible.

Even if you're a superb writer, there will be periods during your script's development when you'll probably find it tough to clearly identify its flaws on your own. It's during these times when you'll benefit from a fresh pair of eyes to provide you with an experienced, objective, and honest outside perspective.

My name is Hy Bender, and I've analyzed and helped fix hundreds of screenplays. I've done this for writers ranging from total beginners to screenwriters who've had Hollywood features produced. Regardless of your level of experience, I'll take your work very seriously and tell you how to make it better.

My credentials as an expert story analyst include:

Founding and running NYScreenwriters.org, one of the most respected screenwriting workshops in New York.
Providing analysis and advice on hundreds of screenplays for writers, directors, and producers.

Writing The Sandman Companion, a nationally bestselling story analysis book focusing on the early work of Neil Gaiman (screenwriter of the $70 million Robert Zemeckis feature film Beowulf, and story writer of the features Stardust and Coraline).

Writing theatre reviews for The New York Times; and articles about film, TV, and other media for such diverse national publications as American Film, Advertising Age, PC Magazine, Yahoo! Internet Life, Spy, and Mad Magazine.

Writing hundreds of comedy, theatre, and TV show reviews for my Web site HyReviews.com.

Writing five books in the popular Dummies series, which demonstrate my ability to explain even dry, complex concepts in an accessible and entertaining manner that anyone can understand. I employ these same skills to describe problems with a script and offer solutions.

Four of Hy's 14 published books

I'm happy to help writers at any experience level. However, please know that I'll treat you like a professional—that is, I'll be bluntly honest, and cut to the chase by focusing on your script's problems. If you have a thin skin, or wish someone to emphasize what you did right, I'm simply not the analyst for you.

But if you want honest feedback about flaws in your screenplay that may have slipped by you and thoughtful suggestions for fixing them, I'd love to be of service. My goal is to help eliminate your script's weaknesses and enhance its strengths so that you can increase your chances of success.

Here's what some of my clients have said about my services:

Hy's work is insightful, on point, and most important—helpful. If you're looking for an honest take on your story, analyzing every aspect from theme to tone to character to plot, I can't recommend anyone more. A 30-minute conversation with Hy cleared up issues I couldn't crack in three weeks of rewrites. I will never send out another script without first getting a lookover from Hy.

—Andrew Lobel, who's currently developing multiple feature film projects for a major studio, an A-list horror director, and a production house, and recently signed with an agent at ICM.

Among your most critical resources as a screenwriter are people you trust to read your script and then give you honest and insightful feedback. That's what's so great about Hy; he's extremely honest and very knowledgeable about screenplays. Hy really knows what he's talking about, and he's one of the few people I listen to regarding my work. Hy is a great resource.

—Brendan Beseth, whose writing credits include the 2000 feature film Lucky Town starring Kirsten Dunst and James Caan.

Hy helped me develop my first screenplay from its initial draft to its final (and very different) version, many rewrites later. It was a lot of work; but I was thrilled to then land a manager on the strength of that single movie script. I've since written a second screenplay, and am now developing a third—and still regularly turn to Hy for his feedback.

—Mariah Wilson, whose second screenplay was recently optioned by the production company that made Finding Neverland and the upcoming Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day.

The worst thing a screenwriter can do is send a script into the marketplace before the pages are ready. Hy's analysis of my screenplay didn't pull any punches. His comments were sometimes humbling, but were also extremely understandable and easy to apply. After integrating Hy's notes, my screenplay is 100% stronger, particularly in theme and execution of my premise. I feel my script will now stand up to even the most discerning studio reader.
—Allan Fair, who's contributed to HBO's Entourage; has had sitcom pilots under consideration at CBS, ABC and NBC; has won Scriptapalooza and TV Writer scriptwriting contests; and is prominently featured on the ScreenStyle DVD How to Pitch Your Movie Idea.

Hy, when I sent my sitcom pilot to be critiqued I was thinking you'd find a few more jokes to squeeze out of it. Boy, were my expectations exceeded! Sure my script has more jokes, but your forcing me to think more about the characters and theme makes the script funnier on a holistic level. Even the premise is funnier! I can't thank you enough.
—Allan Fair (see above)

Note: Before you send your script to anyone, I highly recommend registering it with the Writers Guild of America East (www.wgae.org) or the Writers Guild of America West (www.wga.org). The $22 registration takes only a few minutes and is well worth the peace of mind.

My fee can vary with the work you need done. Most typically, though, I'll analyze a standard-length feature screenplay (i.e., around 110 pages) for $250. That covers:

Carefully reading your screenplay and making notes as I go along.

Writing and emailing you 8-12 pages of thoughtful and to-the-point analysis that will probably make you see your work in ways you never considered.
Spending up to 2 hours with you over the phone so you can ask any questions about both your screenplay and the analysis. (If you live in the US or Canada, I'll call you so you don't incur long distance charges.)

In addition, I offer script doctoring and ghostwriting services, with fees dependent on the details of the project. So if you want to improve your script but don't feel comfortable tackling the work yourself, please feel very welcome to get in touch.

If you're interested in hiring me, please simply email your screenplay, your phone number, and a few words about where you found out about this service to hy@hyreviews.com. (Please send the script as an attachment in Final Draft, Acrobat/PDF, Microsoft Word, or plain text file format.) I'll give your first 30 pages a quick initial read and then email you to say whether I can help.

If we agree to proceed, I'll ask you to send your payment via PayPal.com (which accepts VISA, MasterCard, Discover, and American Express). I'll then write an analysis of your screenplay and arrange to discuss it with you over the phone.

If you'd like to benefit from an expert and impartial view of your script's problems, and also receive on-target suggestions for fixes, I'd love to hear from you. Similarly, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask them. My email address is hy@hyreviews.com.

To read my analysis of the TV comedy series Human Giant,

please visit Hy on Human Giant at HyReviews.com/humangiant.htm.

To read my analysis of NYC comedy shows and theatre productions,

please visit NYC Comedy Picks for Tonight and Hy on Theatre.

If you'd like help developing a book,

please visit my book proposal service at HyOnYourBook.com.

Email: hy@hyreviews.com

HyOnYourScript.com

Last updated July 2008

Click here for the Movie Quote of the Month

Click here for Sixty Years of Great Movie Lines

There are no guarantees in life, and especially in the world of movies. But you can definitely improve your odds of turning your dreams into dollars by making sure your screenplay is as strong as possible.

My credentials as an expert story analyst include:

Founding and running NYScreenwriters.org, one of the most respected screenwriting workshops in New York.

Providing analysis and advice on hundreds of screenplays for writers, directors, and producers.

Writing The Sandman Companion, a nationally bestselling story analysis book focusing on the early work of Neil Gaiman (screenwriter of the $70 million Robert Zemeckis feature film Beowulf, and story writer of the features Stardust and Coraline).

Writing theatre reviews for The New York Times; and articles about film, TV, and other media for such diverse national publications as American Film, Advertising Age, PC Magazine, Yahoo! Internet Life, Spy, and Mad Magazine.

Writing hundreds of comedy, theatre, and TV show reviews for my Web site HyReviews.com.

Writing five books in the popular Dummies series, which demonstrate my ability to explain even dry, complex concepts in an accessible and entertaining manner that anyone can understand. I employ these same skills to describe problems with a script and offer solutions.

But if you want honest feedback about flaws in your screenplay that may have slipped by you and thoughtful suggestions for fixing them, I'd love to be of service. My goal is to help eliminate your script's weaknesses and enhance its strengths so that you can increase your chances of success.

Here's what some of my clients have said about my services:

—Andrew Lobel, who's currently developing multiple feature film projects for a major studio, an A-list horror director, and a production house, and recently signed with an agent at ICM.

—Brendan Beseth, whose writing credits include the 2000 feature film Lucky Town starring Kirsten Dunst and James Caan.

—Mariah Wilson, whose second screenplay was recently optioned by the production company that made Finding Neverland and the upcoming Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day.

Note: Before you send your script to anyone, I highly recommend registering it with the Writers Guild of America East (www.wgae.org) or the Writers Guild of America West (www.wga.org). The $22 registration takes only a few minutes and is well worth the peace of mind.

My fee can vary with the work you need done. Most typically, though, I'll analyze a standard-length feature screenplay (i.e., around 110 pages) for $250. That covers:

Carefully reading your screenplay and making notes as I go along.

Writing and emailing you 8-12 pages of thoughtful and to-the-point analysis that will probably make you see your work in ways you never considered.

Spending up to 2 hours with you over the phone so you can ask any questions about both your screenplay and the analysis. (If you live in the US or Canada, I'll call you so you don't incur long distance charges.)

In addition, I offer script doctoring and ghostwriting services, with fees dependent on the details of the project. So if you want to improve your script but don't feel comfortable tackling the work yourself, please feel very welcome to get in touch.

If we agree to proceed, I'll ask you to send your payment via PayPal.com (which accepts VISA, MasterCard, Discover, and American Express). I'll then write an analysis of your screenplay and arrange to discuss it with you over the phone.

If you'd like to benefit from an expert and impartial view of your script's problems, and also receive on-target suggestions for fixes, I'd love to hear from you. Similarly, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask them. My email address is hy@hyreviews.com.

HyOnYourScript.com

Last updated July 2008

Click here for the Movie Quote of the Month

Click here for Sixty Years of Great Movie Lines

There are no guarantees in life, and especially in the world of movies. But you can definitely improve your odds of turning your dreams into dollars by making sure your screenplay is as strong as possible.

My credentials as an expert story analyst include:

Founding and running NYScreenwriters.org, one of the most respected screenwriting workshops in New York.

Providing analysis and advice on hundreds of screenplays for writers, directors, and producers.

Writing The Sandman Companion, a nationally bestselling story analysis book focusing on the early work of Neil Gaiman (screenwriter of the $70 million Robert Zemeckis feature film Beowulf, and story writer of the features Stardust and Coraline).

Writing theatre reviews for The New York Times; and articles about film, TV, and other media for such diverse national publications as American Film, Advertising Age, PC Magazine, Yahoo! Internet Life, Spy, and Mad Magazine.

Writing hundreds of comedy, theatre, and TV show reviews for my Web site HyReviews.com.

Writing five books in the popular Dummies series, which demonstrate my ability to explain even dry, complex concepts in an accessible and entertaining manner that anyone can understand. I employ these same skills to describe problems with a script and offer solutions.

But if you want honest feedback about flaws in your screenplay that may have slipped by you and thoughtful suggestions for fixing them, I'd love to be of service. My goal is to help eliminate your script's weaknesses and enhance its strengths so that you can increase your chances of success.

Here's what some of my clients have said about my services:

—Andrew Lobel, who's currently developing multiple feature film projects for a major studio, an A-list horror director, and a production house, and recently signed with an agent at ICM.

—Brendan Beseth, whose writing credits include the 2000 feature film Lucky Town starring Kirsten Dunst and James Caan.

—Mariah Wilson, whose second screenplay was recently optioned by the production company that made Finding Neverland and the upcoming Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day.

Note: Before you send your script to anyone, I highly recommend registering it with the Writers Guild of America East (www.wgae.org) or the Writers Guild of America West (www.wga.org). The $22 registration takes only a few minutes and is well worth the peace of mind.

My fee can vary with the work you need done. Most typically, though, I'll analyze a standard-length feature screenplay (i.e., around 110 pages) for $250. That covers:

Carefully reading your screenplay and making notes as I go along.

Writing and emailing you 8-12 pages of thoughtful and to-the-point analysis that will probably make you see your work in ways you never considered.

Spending up to 2 hours with you over the phone so you can ask any questions about both your screenplay and the analysis. (If you live in the US or Canada, I'll call you so you don't incur long distance charges.)

In addition, I offer script doctoring and ghostwriting services, with fees dependent on the details of the project. So if you want to improve your script but don't feel comfortable tackling the work yourself, please feel very welcome to get in touch.

If we agree to proceed, I'll ask you to send your payment via PayPal.com (which accepts VISA, MasterCard, Discover, and American Express). I'll then write an analysis of your screenplay and arrange to discuss it with you over the phone.

If you'd like to benefit from an expert and impartial view of your script's problems, and also receive on-target suggestions for fixes, I'd love to hear from you. Similarly, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask them. My email address is hy@hyreviews.com.

Click here for the Movie Quote of the Month